You are who you attract!

What once began with "Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are", later became "a man is what he eats". (Anthelme Brillat-Savarin. Ludwig Andreas Feuerbach.)

What was meant was "the food one eats has a bearing on what one's state of mind and health are." In other words, the two are directly related. Sort of a cause and effect or domino effect if you will.

I contend the same is true of the statement "You are who you attract". Meaning 'the people you attract (both friendships and relationships) have a bearing on where your state of mind/heart are'

For a few years I judged my love for God by the things I most publicly did. The bible studies I facilitated, the sincere time I spent helping others, and the Christian events I attended. But if one took a magnifying glass to my relationships with the opposite sex, they would have found me fraternizing with men who were nothing like the God I claimed to love & teach about. One could say I was living quite the double life. Claiming to want a godly man (one who feared and served God) yet quick to contact the ones in my "black book" who could swoon me and secretly satisfy my lusts.

Upon reading a book, I began to wonder why I was attracting these "bugga-wolves" (I like to call them) and I quickly came to realize that it was me. Like attracts like. I attract sexual guys because I wanted to be sexual (lets keep it real). I wanted a pure man to desire me, but I didn't want (myself) to be pure; although deep down I thought I did.

Once I made a decision to starve myself from the ugly (yet natural desires I had) and lose myself in what God wanted for my life, godly men poured into my life for the following 10 years. Every man that pursued me (with an serious intent) was someone who was walking with the Lord and admired me (from a distance) because they saw the same in me.

As I look at my circle of friends, I can sincerely say that the people I keep closest are those who (aren't perfect) but strive to keep short accounts with God, seek accountability, serve others and want their lives to reflect Gods love to others. This has made my life very rich and overflowing as these women keep me sharp (in character). Furthermore, I don't have to hope for a godly man, I know one will find me 'gleaning in my field' (Ruth 2) someday.

Huck has a point!

 

"He controls me...he still controls me"
"He owns me, Liv, he owns me!"

The closing moments of Scandal's Season 3, Episode 3 were gut wrenching for most Gladiators as one of our favorite characters and seemingly stoic assassin breaks down in tears.

Who thought Huck could be controlled by something other than his innate desire to kill? But after watching this episode, we find out that the one man (Olivia's Dad) who is responsible for his need and ability to kill is the very one who has the power to steer Huck's wrath towards whatever target he so chooses.

Huck finds himself "owned" by another and out of a position of control over his own actions. And here we find this statuesque, meek, protector of a man frustrated at his slavery to another.

Oh, if only we would be as broken over the sin in our lives and the slavery it points to.
Romans 6 & 7 talk about this very struggle. How we, as believers, still have sin within us (the desire to sin) but we also have the nature of God (His Spirit) living within causing a tug-of-war (of sorts) between a desire to do what's right, and a strong itch to give in to our innate desire to do wrong. (Rom. 7:23-26)

Both passages describe our life before we invite Christ in: as slaves to sin. Under sin's control. Sin owns us!!!! I imagine us being like Huck, unable to escape our mental depravity or the 'army of evil desires' within us (James 4:1) and feeling frustrated to tears, in light of this!

But our situations doesn't have to be/end as bleak as Huck's did. Though we are (can be) slaves to whatever masters us, the good news is, we don't have to be! Paul so eloquently ends the 7th chapter of Romans by proudly stating, "Who can free us from this control? Thank God for Jesus Christ who delivers us!"

A Wolf can only Hide in Sheep's Clothing for so long

Beware when leasing a car from a used car lot. They will sell you a car as if its brand new! You know, same price, polish the outside, vacuum the inside, let you know the tags are up to date and don't have to be renewed for a year, tell you all the great things about it and hand you your keys as if you've just won a prize!

Try asking for the Blue Book report on the car, though. They might start giving you the run around and trying to change the subject. What they don't want you to know is that though the car looks good and was only used "a few times by a Rental company"; its about a month away from needing 4 new tires, about 2 months away from needing new brakes, the previous owner smoked and that none of the factory pieces have been changed since it was new.

People, be careful. When you meet a new girl or guy, they will sell themselves as the perfect mate for you. They might dress the part, shove the 'selective' resume of their life in your face (you know, all the great things they've done, and the church they attend) and say/do all the thoughtful things you've been looking for. The outside of the "car" might look great and peak the excitement for purchase. Your family and friends might even buy into them & give you kudos for finding such a good person.


Beware, though...try finding out the blue book report on this person. Not to shove their past in their face, but a persons' past plays a role in their future to some degree. If a person was in an unhealthy relationship before yours, don't think they will automatically become a healthy mate for YOU. People don't change for people. People change because God does a work in their life. People bring unhealthy habits into new relationships and try to cover them like a dealership tries to cover the cigarette smoke with a new car smell air freshner. But the stain is too deep. The upholstery either needs to be changed or steam cleaned. The same is true with your "mate".

Be careful, before getting serious, that you observe patterns of how people behave in the low moments of your life. How do they handle disappointment, rejection, loss, anger, etc. These qualities tell you more about a person than their words concerning how they feel about you.
"A wolf can only stay in sheep's clothing for so long."

Race for the Cure

When I think about the different Hollywood stars whose lives are affected by the onslaught of a certain disease whether in their personal life or that of a family member, a few people come to mind.

Nancy Brinker, who founded the Susan G Komen after losing her sister to Breast Cancer, dedicated her life to raising money for Cancer research.

Toni Braxton, upon dealing with the struggle of a special needs child, has become vocal about Autism and a spokesperson for early detection.

When people's lives become a victim of an undetected, crippling or deadly disease it changes their world. It leads them down roads they never planned to walk. Their passions and ambitions change and become the guiding force in their lives. Their new focus is to use all of their faculties, resources, and know-how, to help transform the lives of others who may be affected or could possibly become affected.

This very process clearly outlines what is expected of a transformed believer. Once we come to realize the deadly and crippling virus of sin we have been infected with (causing us to hate the very things of God); yet accept the gift of eternal life through God's Son, Jesus, we are given a chance to become change agents. Our new passion and ambitions to see people's lives changed by this "Good News", should become the guiding force in our lives. How we treat people, how we love, what we say and do should be the intentional focus as it serves as our resources for helping people come in contact with the CURE!

In this manner, our lives and love become the vocal platforms from which we warn and equip others in efforts to win more spokesmen for the Gospel.

1 + 1 does NOT = 2

Our society is strictly proof based. Everything is scientific and exact. It must be explained or has to be explained in order to be reasonable or true.

Too often I find myself adopting this same mindset when it comes to God. After soaking in the stories of others and observing their lifestyles and the outcomes therein, I tend to take inventory of my own issues and situations. I scrutinize the outcomes that are a result and try to fit it into this equation I've formulated.

"If I strive to live right + have a heart that desires to do God's will = I will struggle."

                                                        BUT

"If I wild out + do what I want = God will give grace and send me the things I desire!"

My problem? Candidly speaking, what am I supposed to think when someone I know purposely lives a loose life, and then meets an amazing guy who is wholly committed to them and ends up turning their life around.

What do I say when someone I know doesn't care about God and does everything to provide for themselves, then their lives end up prosperous, able to successfully meet their needs and pay off debt?

In short, why do bad people end up living the good life; all the while, good people suffer?

And like lightning, it hit me! The conviction of the Holy Spirit:

1. There is no such thing as 'good' and 'bad' people. "All have sinned and fall short"..."Our righteousness is as filthy rags in God's eyes"..."No one does what is right, no not one"

2. "God is fair; causing the rain to fall on the just and the unjust." He is no respecter of persons.

In His eyes there is no such thing as 1 + 1 = 2 because He cannot be contained. He cannot be manipulated. He is God & He does as He pleases. His picture is bigger than ours, His plan is greater than ours. To Him, our lives are more than just about the time spent on Earth.

He (His plan/His will) cannot be put in a box; there's no equation to predict or control what He purposes for my life. "He is faithful even when we are faithless." We would get frustrated thinking if we follow some spiritual equation to happiness and success (in our eyes) and then blame God when it doesn't happen. Gods version and idea of success, prosperity, provision, and success isn't exactly what the world has trained us to believe those words mean. His thoughts and ways are NOT ours.

My resolve? Live humbly, love mercy and walk justly with my God. Exercise faith, for without it, it's impossible to please Him. Seek first His Kingdom and righteousness. My obedience to these callings don't guarantee a problem free life. Find joy in simply pleasing God.

References: Romans 3:23, Isaiah 64:6, Romans 3:10, Matthew 5:45, Acts 10:34, 2 Tim 2:13, Micah 6:8, Hebrews 11:6, Matthew 6:33, Isaiah 55:8

The grass ISN'T greener...

It's a cliche phrase we know all too well but are hesitant to utter:

"The grass is greener on the other side."

Yet the tale is as old as time.

A single woman yearns to be married. The newly married woman desires deeply to have kids and start a family. The wife/mother is ready for her teenage kids to leave home and retire with her hubby.

The insecure, modelesque woman thinks she's fat and craves to be beautiful and desirable. The slightly thick woman longs for a thinner body in hopes to be pursued by men.

The young man growing up in want, aspires to be a prosperous, well known athlete or famous in some manner. The wealthy, popular guy feels insecure and lonely though he has everything he wants.

The scenarios go on and though I've not been on both sides of 'the fence', I've experienced one side while confronted with the magnetic pull of the other. In addition, I've lent a sympathetic ear to those on both sides of the same fence. The single person who searches for companionship in the institution of marriage feels the grass they're missing out on will satisfy their longing. Meanwhile, I've heard the spouse, who is weary from the strains and toil necessary to make a marraige work, warn those who are 'free', against the wanting of THEIR grass. All the while revealing their secret appetite for the grass they once partok in.

So which grass is better? Single or Married? Rich or Poor? Thin or Thick?
I contend that no grass is greener than the other. For the grass on 'the other side' is as falsly satisfying as the cool waters of a mirage in a desert.

I agree, however, with the counter-statement "Water the grass on your own side!" This insinuates that until one becomes content with their current state in life, they will never 'be satisfied'. That doesn't mean we have to stay where we are, it simply means contentment is the key to inner peace and security. Each side of the fence (a situation), if you will, has it's own grass (issues) that needs watering (facing and dealing with). So rather than jumping the fence to experience the other side, why not nurture the season of your life you are currently in and celebrate its beauties.

If given the opportunity to venture to the other side, use the same character and wisdom to handle the issues that side presents and take in its beauty and enjoy its fruits!

I often struggle with my season of singleness, longing deeply for the companionship of a partner to do life with. But equally as often, I meditate on those who are married and how they must come home to situations, conversations and events that I (as a single) won't ever have to face. Those once single-minded persons who must now answer to someone and gain permission to do things they once freely did--well that's just not my lot. When I think about those who have lost their spouse to illness or some tragic event; they must deal/cope with a healing from years of attachment & co-dependency that I don't experience. These sobering thoughts bring me back down from the high of desiring marriage. They force me to celebrate my season; embrace it and use it wisely! This is my grass; I must tend to it, water it and frolic on my own lawn!

Objection!...Over-Ruled!

The current Zimmerman trial has gripped and seized the attention of many Americans for the past few weeks. Many of these watchers are connected through social media, freely commenting and somehow submitting their own analysis of the situation:

Is Zimmerman to be believed as having been the agressor and therefore it unlawful to deem him as simply acting in self-defense?

Or did young Martin place Zimmerman in a position to where he had no other choice than to act in self-defense?

As I join in the roar that mimics "Convict him!", I can't help but identify with those who cried "Crucify Him" on the evening Jesus was falsely accused by those who ignorantly blurted their accusations but knew not enough information to make such a claim!

I'm not, in the least saying Zimmerman is being falsely accused; what I AM saying, however, is how ignorant of me to assume Zimmerman doesn't deserve to be 'innocent until proven guilty' like any other citizen with rights.

When I think of the wrongdoings that have ensued because of my sin-nature, the verdict I deserve is as obvious as I believe Zimmerman's should be. With every bit of evidence the prosecution can enter against me, and every credible witness that could attest to my behaviors; no objection by my defense attorney could go over-ruled! My wrongdoing may not lead me to serve a prison sentence, but if I believe that somehow this renders me in less need of grace or saving, then I'm sorely mistaken!

I don't feel sorry for Zimmerman but nor do I know what his intentions were or what happened on that tragic night. What I do know is that because my representation is Jesus Christ and His blood covers my guilty status; God as my Righteous Judge counts His Son's blood upon every objection and proclaims "Over-Ruled" each and every time!

This acquittal leaves me humbled and in a position to offer grace and forgiveness to others, while leaving justice to the ONLY One who can properly judge!

I do hope the system does it's best to consider and rule in the favor of justice, in this situation; yet I leave true JUSTICE to Him who is able to Righteously Rule as is proven in the case of Kim v Eternity.