My Mind's playing tricks on me

Some of yal may be too young to remember that song by the Geto Boys back in the 90's. "My Mind's playing tricks on me" talked about the paranoia, hallucinations and delusions that can exist in our mental state. Am I the only one whose mind takes me back to the mistakes I've made:

• The great guys I've dated but nit-picked at and thus let go of.
• The foolish activities I chose to behave in when I knew they were no good for me to begin with.
• The secret sins I indulged in to temporarily satisfy my hidden cravings.

The mental chastisement is often too much to bear. The emotional side of me encourages me to run home and bury my head in my pillow and cry. If left to these thoughts too long, thoughts of depression are only a block away.

The only thing that pulls my mind away from this trap, is the Holy Spirit's reminding me of God's character: His faithfulness, love, patience with me, forgiving nature. All of these things come rushing in and all of a sudden I'm not so blue.

I went to the beach the other day and although the beach is a beautiful place to be because of the blue water and the crashing waves, there's an unavoidable evil you MUST face before you hit the water. Its the burning, sticky sand. Those little irritants get into everything you bring...your clothes, your shoes, your electronics, your food (if you're not careful) and your drinks! It's inevitable. It's so frustrating that as sure as I get all the sand washed off of me from the ocean and make it back to my blanket, I've managed to get full of sand all over again. Then my blanket gets infected as well as pretty much everything I touch.

Have you ever dealt with tormenting thoughts of your past? It's inevitable and an unavoidable thing that the enemy (via your mind) wants to control you by sticking those burning thoughts of your past, your mishaps, faults and mistakes to your conscious. Like irritants they can infiltrate your emotions and take you down paths that lead to depression.

Joseph (Genesis chapters 37-46) had a lot of things he could have regretted: telling his brothers about his dreams, getting passed over when the cupbearer and baker's dreams were interpreted, and maybe even saying 'no' to Potiphar's wife may have seemed like a bad idea in a weak moment. But in chapter 45 verse 5 he tells his brothers 'don't think this was a bad thing on your part...God did this!'.

"I form light and create darkness,
    I make harmonies and create discords.
    I, God, do all these things." Isaiah 45:7

Not that He orchestrates sin, but he permits the punishment of its actions and is Sovereign enough to use it for His benefit.

Yessss! That's it...there's your blue water and crashing waves! God allows calamity and darkness and bad times! He has so much purpose that lies beyond the sand grains of our lives. He wants the waves of his love, mercy, grace and joy to crash upon our lives and wash away the stains of our past so we are ignited into new, refreshing seasons.