Looking in others' windows

In my junior year of college, I lived off campus and walked to a few of my classes. One afternoon, returning home from a class, I passed up a few cars parked along the road and one in particular caught my attention. Not because of the make and model of the car, but because of what was inside of it. It caused me to stop and pause, starring at the contents wishing what I gazed at, were mine. Not long after that, I ended up starring so long that I caught a glimpse of my own reflection in the window's mirror-like qualities. Seeing my reflection snapped me out of my trance and caused me to reflect on something less superficial than my face -my heart.

Much like this trance I was caught up in, time and time again, I have found myself mesmerized by what other people have. It's gotten quite redundant and annoying. I'm not one to get caught up in material things, or so I'd like to think; so I had to put my finger on the pulse of my heart. If I continue to get envious when others obtain things and then throw my pity party before God, then what am I saying?

I'm admitting that I'm discontent with what I have, that I am ungrateful for the things I have been allotted. I'm spitting in the face of the God who sees me (Genesis 16:13), the One who gives "good gifts" to His children (James 1:17, Matthew 7:11).

I was watching the Steve Harvey show the other day and a couple was sharing the pain they were experiencing from infertility. They couldn't understand why (in their words) "God was punishing them" by not giving them what they wanted. A guest couple that Steve had on the show, shared these words of consolation to this grieving couple:

"My husband and I went through the same thing years ago...we felt the exact same pain and as I sat in church one Sunday, I cried out to the Lord, "Why are you punishing me?". Weeks later, I went in for a routine check up only to find out that at 33, I had breast cancer. I was fortunate to catch it in it's primary stages and doctors were able to ensure that no trace of it was left in my body. It wasn't until after that season, that I realized our inability to have children was God's way of protecting me as I went through cancer removal. Not long after that, we conceived."

I'm sure the couple was touched to hear a warm story, but I was deeply moved as it reminded me of God's "gifts". How God knows all things and more than giving us "things", he desires to protect us- that's His greatest gift. He wants to protect us from the temporary and eternal destruction of sin just as He desires to protect us from the envy and callousness "material things" can bring. Often times the plethora of things can distract us from God's purpose for our lives.

It's not so much that He longs to keep "things" from us, but to keep 'things' from having us is His desire. He knows that with character, we can handle 'stuff' and He can entrust us with more when we are good stewards of what we currently possess.

No more should my weak, fragile prayers sing out "Everyone else has it...why is it 'they' can have it and I cannot?" No more should I spit in His face with my longing for the things I see others obtain. Instead, I should look upon what He has satisfied me with and be grateful. I should rejoice over the fact that He has trusted me to be a steward over what I already have. The much deeper thought of what He could be protecting me from, should bring solace in my heart.

Discontentment and envy will always be our enemy, but gratitude and stewardship can not only keep our enemy at bay, but eventually demolish it.