Hurt people, Hurt people

Often times in life, we may come across a situation where an old friend decides to 'burn the bridge' of a friendship unexpectedly (and maybe even without a complete understanding of why). This can cause a lot of hurt and emotional imbalance. Depending on how deep or long the friendship, it can lead to nights filled with tears and even borderline depression.

The phrase "hurt people, hurt people" comes to mind. Its the thought that when people are hurt by others, they tend to inflict that same type of hurt on those who cross their path. This, whether knowingly or unknowingly tends to happen and thus begins a domino affect of damaged emotions and battered relationships.

As I reflected upon this and how it's hit so close to home for me, I happened upon an interesting thought: 'Hurt people don't have to hurt people.'

We use that phrase to excuse (if you will) or justify the actions of people, but for believers, honestly we are not justified by that phrase. As a matter of fact, we are held to an entirely different standard.

We are expected to bring our wounds, hurts and pain to the Lord. In exchange, He promises His healing and frees us from having to hurt other people. His ointment soothes the injury that results from our wounds which compels us to act in a way that pleases Him.

Psalm 147:3 "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds"

 

 

No longer should reacting to situations become our mantra, but acting in the power and under the influence of the Holy Spirit becomes our way of life.

 

If you're the one who has burned the bridge, pray the Lord heals your broken heart and rectify relationships you may have destroyed. If you're the one reaping the destruction of the burned bridge, pray for that person who was hurt...that the Lord would heal them. But understand while men are predisposed to rejecting others, it's Gods nature to accept us. Find healing and freedom in that truth!

Bio-illogical Clock

A year ago, I had fibroid removal surgery (just non-cancerous growths on my internal lady parts). It was quite the experience, emotional, physically and spiritually.

Emotionally: My biological clock was booming in my ears! It didn't help that my sexy, African American OBGYN was questioning why a pretty gal like me wasn't married yet. His line of questioning had me wondering if HE was available for the baby making process! Ya know!? LOL (low-key kidding) But seriously, I wasn't getting any younger and even when I went to get a 2nd opinion, my much older, very foreign-accented doctor found a way to clearly articulate that I needed to hurry and pick a man to have a baby with.

Physically: I'll spare you the grimy details, but in short, there was a lot of pain, a huge belly and one very specific woman in a New Testament story that I could have identified with a bit. From that, it was imperative that if I wanted to conceive anytime soon, those watermelon sized fibroid needed to be removed for the safety of that process.

Here's the catch! My doctors conveyed to me that the fibroids could return in as little as 2 years and that I needed to plan to get pregnant within that window ..."or else".

Spiritually: Bear with me as I connect the two.

Plan A: My own bio-LOGICAL plan- Get married (whenever God sends a suitor), conceive and viola...my life is set!

Plan B: Take my Doctor's advice- rush my plan along by considering a rush order on plan A.

Outlandish Plan C: Considering that in 1990 I gave my life to the Lord, fuel my growing desire to trust Him with the details and plans of my life.

Which door do I choose? Plan A, B or ...and I do mean OR... wait on the Lord. But do I really have time to wait? I mean according to plan B's advice?

Genesis 16 is an account of a man and woman who did just that. Chose their own plan over God's and although God saw fit to make provision within that, there were some repercussions from their decision. It was very obvious what was expected of me...to wait and trust God's plan for my life.


Did I get the surgery? Yes!
But if God doesn't allow me to conceive within 2 years, that's His business...not my queue to jump in the driver's seat and take the wheel. Because ponder this: I can decide to get married, attempt to conceive, and He STILL (Sovereignly) decide that fibroids or no fibroids...He doesn't will that I have children that way.

Ultimately its His temple that I manage and He desires we yield to His plan...for it is far better than ones we could ever dream up or chase after!

Be encouraged friend, "wait, I say, on the Lord..."

My Mind's playing tricks on me

Some of yal may be too young to remember that song by the Geto Boys back in the 90's. "My Mind's playing tricks on me" talked about the paranoia, hallucinations and delusions that can exist in our mental state. Am I the only one whose mind takes me back to the mistakes I've made:

• The great guys I've dated but nit-picked at and thus let go of.
• The foolish activities I chose to behave in when I knew they were no good for me to begin with.
• The secret sins I indulged in to temporarily satisfy my hidden cravings.

The mental chastisement is often too much to bear. The emotional side of me encourages me to run home and bury my head in my pillow and cry. If left to these thoughts too long, thoughts of depression are only a block away.

The only thing that pulls my mind away from this trap, is the Holy Spirit's reminding me of God's character: His faithfulness, love, patience with me, forgiving nature. All of these things come rushing in and all of a sudden I'm not so blue.

I went to the beach the other day and although the beach is a beautiful place to be because of the blue water and the crashing waves, there's an unavoidable evil you MUST face before you hit the water. Its the burning, sticky sand. Those little irritants get into everything you bring...your clothes, your shoes, your electronics, your food (if you're not careful) and your drinks! It's inevitable. It's so frustrating that as sure as I get all the sand washed off of me from the ocean and make it back to my blanket, I've managed to get full of sand all over again. Then my blanket gets infected as well as pretty much everything I touch.

Have you ever dealt with tormenting thoughts of your past? It's inevitable and an unavoidable thing that the enemy (via your mind) wants to control you by sticking those burning thoughts of your past, your mishaps, faults and mistakes to your conscious. Like irritants they can infiltrate your emotions and take you down paths that lead to depression.

Joseph (Genesis chapters 37-46) had a lot of things he could have regretted: telling his brothers about his dreams, getting passed over when the cupbearer and baker's dreams were interpreted, and maybe even saying 'no' to Potiphar's wife may have seemed like a bad idea in a weak moment. But in chapter 45 verse 5 he tells his brothers 'don't think this was a bad thing on your part...God did this!'.

"I form light and create darkness,
    I make harmonies and create discords.
    I, God, do all these things." Isaiah 45:7

Not that He orchestrates sin, but he permits the punishment of its actions and is Sovereign enough to use it for His benefit.

Yessss! That's it...there's your blue water and crashing waves! God allows calamity and darkness and bad times! He has so much purpose that lies beyond the sand grains of our lives. He wants the waves of his love, mercy, grace and joy to crash upon our lives and wash away the stains of our past so we are ignited into new, refreshing seasons.